Looks like you have mastered the ins and out of the game of baseball.

This is a beter explanation of the game of baseball....
Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: A good friend of mine used to say, "This is a very simple game. You throw the ball, you catch the ball, you hit the ball. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes it rains." Think about that for a while.

Wow, can you make me whatever your drinking

From the movie Bull Durham.....

I like the movie Applebee's! I HEARD IT'S A REAL KNOCKOUT!

How do we relieve the pressure?

1) We yell at them for not doing something they were never properly taught.

2) We go crazy for them when they produce, but are the biggest meanies when they come up short!

3) Instead of being their support we are another weight added to their little shoulders.

4) We think coaches are trainers! You must teach your kid respect and composure. They are there to coach. If your kid is uncontrollable step up and pull him or her and and address the issue.(what good is it having an athlete that can't function in the real world?)You are still a parent first. Character starts at home. A child is only a mirrors image of their parents.

5) Seems everyone has forgot that the coach-ability of a player is a huge % of their ability to be a success.

6) Since when does anyone feel it is ok to bring red cups to youth baseball? ( It's hot out and tempting, but dead wrong all the same!)

7) Explaining that going 0 for 5 and winning is better than 5 for 5 and loosing. This is a team sport.

8)Why should a player ever be ejected from a game by an ump? Shouldn't the coaches be concerned with his players behavior and representation of a team? Coach should toss him for the game. It has a more powerful message!

9) Explain to the kids they are on a TRAVEL team and if at anytime they are falling short of that level of play, It will be addressed. (if you really don't need him or her, encourage or help them find a team that does) You stop learning when you stop playing!

10) If you are not a true leader! Step up and demand one be found!

Theres been some talk about a fight at an Applebee's. A parent got arrested? This might not be the forum for this though.

After investigating the allegations this is what we found. There was no coach parent fight.

The coach had a terrible toothache and was in desperate need of a Applebee's slider. The parent being concerned for the coaches health grabbed a slider in each hand and feed the coach thru the left and right side of his head. This quick influx of food made the coach fall off his chair. Just be glad it wasn't an all you could eat buffet! Thanks for saving the coach.

Actually after even further investigation sounds like the parent has about 50 felony counts against him.

Guess he's not a smooth criminal, dunt da dunt dunt, da da , dunt dunt , da da dunt dunt!

This AllStar voting thing is crazy! All you coaches with kids with 10, 12, 14 votes for one kid should be required to turn in your book to back this up. I bet your books would not justify those votes! Neither would it match the other teams book. All the other kids should ask their coaches what's going on!

Who cares about the votes? Good judgement, and yes, the scorebook can tell you almost everything.

The problem is Little Johnny's Dad has been around for several seasons, holds the team sh&% stirrer's hand, and neither can look across the field with any clue. You do your best for LJ, give him plenty of chances, but he can't deliver. He bats .180 and falls asleep in the field every game. Obviously the ball finds him and the votes do not. The stretch is just giving him a vote because he finally made a decent catch or something routine went right.

Every kid makes an error/drops a ball, what separates them is the falling asleep & poor situational play. So, daddy should stop blaming and bad-mouthing the coaches for LJ's failings, and realize, as in life, the kid has to seize the opportunity he's given. Daddy, accept the gift playing time your kid received without earning and remember how you hated the bottom of the roster receiving it in the past.

Show some class and root for all the kids (regardless of the votes you study). Not for other kids to fail so Little Johnny looks better. Addition by subtraction the second daddy's impending cut comes.

They do have an NJBL Allstar Voting thread on here you know. You can post all your comments in that thread. I guess you guys don't flip thru the forum pages. I'll posts something in there so it will be on the most recent list and on page one for you idiots.

what page do we go to for a translation ?

QUE?

Well it was on page two, but now I just made it go to the most recent by posting something in there, so now its on page one. DUH WHICH WAY DID HE GO, WHICH WAY DID HE GO.

Wow can anyone say LORD HELMET!

THIS IS WHAT COULD BE HEARD COMING FROM YOUR DUGOUT,

I say, I say, What's that big chicken hawk!
That's a joke... I say, that's a joke, son.
Boy's got a mouth like a cannon, always shootin' off.
You gotta.. I say, you gotta keep it on your toes! Toes that is!
Now, pay attention, son.
Pay attention when I'm talking to ya, boy!
Boy's like a tattoo. Gets right under your skin.
Okay, I'll shut up. Some fellas have to keep their tongues flappin' but not me. I was brought up right. My pa used to tell me to shut up and I'd shut up. I wouldn't say nothin'. One time darn near starved to death. WOULDN'T TELL HIM I WAS HUNGRY!!
Boy's as sharp as a bowling ball.
I don't see no hula hula girls.
We have been flim-flammed.
Fortunately, I keep my feathers numbered for just such an emergency.
I say, I say, boy that's not how you make no airplane.
Boy's like a dead horse -- got no get-up-and-go.
That boy's as strong as an ox, and just about as smart.
This is gonna cause more confusion than a mouse in a burlesque show!
Go away, boy, ya bother me!
Kid don't stop talking so much he'll get his tongue sun burned.
That girl's like that road between Fort Worth and Dallas ...No curves.
Don't you, I say don't you call ME a chicken -- you chicken!
I don't think this kid's got all his marbles. Shakes his head when he means yes and nods when he means no.
If I'm a roo - Ah say - if I'm a rooster, I hope to be struck by--
[KAPOW] Well, let's put it another way. Way that is.
Some days it don't pay to get outta bed!
Did ya see that hawk after those hens? He scared 'em! That Rhode Island Red turned white, then blue. Rhode Island, red white and blue! That's a joke, son, a flag-waver! You're built too low. The fast ones go over your head. Ya got a hole in your glove. I keep pitchin' 'em and you keep missin' 'em! Ya gotta keep your eye on the ball! Eye. Ball. Eyeball! I almost had a gag, son--a joke, that is!
Well, woman, blink your eyes or something. Yeesh!
Say, boy, you cover about as much as a flapper skirt in a high wind.
You've gotta be a magician to keep a kid's attention more than two minutes nowadays.
Place your bet - Ah say - place your bets, gentlemen. Winnner plays, loser stays. Everyone's a winne - well, not everyone.
A sensitive mind won't stand being picked on.
The dawg's busier than a centipede at a toe-counting contest.
Hey Dawg! I've come to bury the hatchet! Ha, ha. Not in your pointed head, Boy. I come in peace! I brought you a peace-offerin'.
No no boy!! You're meant to hit the ball. No the bawl!!!
The snow's so deep, the farmers have to jack up the cows so they can milk 'em!
That dawg is strictly G.I. -- Gibbering Idiot!
Eh...any of this gettin' through that little ol' blue bonnet of yours?
OH that woman. Gotta mouth like an outboard motor. All the time! Putputputputputput-phut-phut-phut-putputputputputputputputphew!
I don't know what you're doing with that bowling ball, girly. But I'm not gonna stand by and let a lady do a man's job.
That boy's as timid as a canary at a cat-show.
I need, I say, I need a pointer, and that dog's got just the head for it. Pointed, that is.
Go away, boy! Or I'll spank you where the feathers are thinnest.
What'ya doin' with a pump, boy? Diggin' for oil? You're crazy, boy. There's no oil within 500 miles of here. Geology of the ground's all wrong. Even if there WAS oil you'd need a drill not a tire pump.
Nice girl but about as sharp as a sack 'a wet mice.
Adios you chicken-pluckin' little stinker!
Explain yourself! Yer tounge's flappin' but no noise is comin' outa yer big mouth!
Pay attention to me boy - I'm not just talkin' to hear my head roar!
That dawg's as subtle as a hand grenade in a barrel 'a oatmeal.
'Course, you know, this means war.
Hey, give me that! (takes the axe away from the cat) Who do you think you are, George Washington? (hits the cat over the head with the axe) Hm, there's no cherry trees around here.
THIS - ah say - THIS CALLS FOR RETALIATION!
Don't you wanna look at your cards first, son? Boy's about as sharp as a bowlin' ball.
Ah'm a rooster, son, not a chicken! Pay at-ah say, pay attention, boy! Ah'm talkin' to ya! Kid doesn't listen to a word Ah say.
First - ah say - first time in my life someone else shot my mouth off.
Boy's as sharp as a pound of wet liver!
I can, I say, I can run faster that in high heels *pause* I ain't saying I wear high heels
[edit]

If no one is perfect does that mean I do not exist?

What if the hokey pokey really is what it's all about?

Find a good doctor with a comfortable couch. I'll be glad to send you the co-pay. Might take several years of session because it appears your brain is quite a busy place.

A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.

I used too, but after 2 weeks he was all better.